Oaxaca.

The rest is history. Better like that. Since I miss friends from Brazil more I imagined. Beach, sea, hotness, misty air. Acai, beautiness of people, dancing nights, drums..

But the other side is here with me. As always Mexico convert me into more sweet Nina..softer, lighter, in calm and knowledgment that is on tips of fingers. Just an action away.

Meeting great people is putting u deeper into the living society.

Im talking classes of guitar. Took before in a small school. The noise, the mixture of students that have no idea and students that are pushing violins bow, guitars gets peach with them, knowing what they are doing..the other room of practice was separated by open door and open top wall. Nothing was to make silence in there. To much noise and to little or better no interest of teacher towards his students..a waning place. didn’t like and I left as passiveness is encountering many people of not being a good friend with it!!! Believe it doesn’t even have a sex definition. Way to passive for it!!!

Hehehe.

“Julio is a great guitarist player, teacher, composer..here is his number!”, Guillermo is a sweetest man I have found. In life!! Just being round him makes u happy and content. U just know that all is the way it should be. He is actually Willy!!! Grayed hair architect, with a characteristic nose and warm eyes, great Jaime’s friend. Just yesterday when he had a whole weekend visits and bumping in each other is a common thing, jajaja, we ended up sharing the whole, Mexico lost in football, day.

It turned out all more than that!

Went to a big market an hour away, after Jaime drove me to see dogs that I found last Friday leaving a swimming pool, that was aloud to enjoy alone in after opening hours, big Olympic pool, back in waters arms, happy ,happy. And as I was leaving caught a horrible and unforgiving situation that a dog was in. He has a collar that is starting to opening his neck. It’s a middle aged Doberman. On a half meter chain. Not even able to stand proper. No food for long weeks left him laying as a pile of bones. Dry pot, no water , no shade, under hot Oaxacan sun...and a white young, like year and a half, friendly dog that has just began the same destiny a meter away.

Went to buy food in a next open kitchen tent by the road..rice and left over’s of meat made a perfect snack, water. They don’t chew, they were just swallowing as big as they could bite in the food. It can tear ur heart apart!

Next day.

I found nice butchers that gave me a lot of meet, cooked it with cuscus and went to feed them, with water. Today im stepping on that property as a blond stupid girl with a lot of pain in her self always finding comfort with dogs..hope a change can be made with the owner. “Please, universe. Step on a good side with me! Lets awake goodness in this man! Please! What do u say?”

The rest of the day putt me to look for balance. Thinking having a perfect day, after realizing it a situation like that turned out. And the minute I wanted to shout out of me “WhY, THE FUCK WE CREATED THIS SUFFERING!? Why choosing pain and stupidity at all times..WHY??!?!?”

It came clear. Its to balance. If one day we decide not to enjoy anymore, the pain will automatically disappear, to! As minute when someone is happy there is one, at the same time, very sad. And between them various people being caught in the middle of the process. So if u would put them together u would find all stages from happy to sad that we go through on their faces. Emotional exposition, this could be. Lets make theater of us! For all of us to see. How true that is.

Understand of life better is making me surrender to life in a much grater scale. Im not afraid as I use to be. I accept fear and sadness and understanding above it. So it comforts me at the same time. Even it’s really letting go. Working in not accepting other’s misery , pain happiness, excitement as my own.

Big luggage gets of ur chest.

Be brave and clean ur self from things that don’t serve to anybody. Than act out of wisdom!

We left for ruins after breakfast in a market place and after game. Mitla, they close it in front of our faces..in good will we left for another’s..Yagul! inspirational view. Some nice photos, than off to dinner time in a fairy caste house of Guilermo on the hill. Uaaau…young chef was there and prepare a “Risotto” as Sicilian gene is running strongly in his vein. Vine and great conversations…night tock us into the sl

eeping point. Was time to say goodbye from beautiful people.

And hallo, today!!!

Mexico

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“In the worst case I will just go home, or Cusco, or Salvador..” usuall response as echo when a tremble salutes a new life in a different country or a city. This time is not opening a new book or just writing a new page. It is an old book with a new chapter. So that means it has a continuing process in it. With some well familiar characters and more the main character is back and it has all this old memories, but many new experiences.

What come to a writer’s first thought is a a question of what is the point of this chapter what is different, there must be a growing part?? Some kind of new perspective on all this life situations??

Before writing must say it feels as a circle being whole. If i ever pointed the beginning of something than for shore this feels as an end. Or conclusion, or answer..many more turns out to be, but definitely the opposite of a time when a story of Mexico began.

Mexico 2

Didn’t sleep much. Saying goodbye to friends and land of Salvador was more tiring for me as I ever wanted to confess. The mission to learn and to know the life beyond emotional detachments let me down and was sad. But as good works in a competition with bad, was also happy. After all I was heading back to a place where I was a princess. Family loved me and I love them. More. As a princess I could see places and was excepted in all best things that one could imagine.

Waiting the night to pass and plane to the chosen destination iwas ready came fast in expectation and long in all that was putted in perspective that night. It was mainly ex boyfriend and life I could not achieve not even knowing it was considered as a achievement .

I understand now after a year why situation was the way it was. How I could be turned into directions allowing my self to breath the different decisions just because I wanted to try one thing..

..

Some how I manage to erase him few minutes after I left the land of dreams.

All that happened to us, decisions we made made sense, so was happy it turned out the way it did and so did the ending that is still converting into something, but that should be explained in its time of the story.

Knowing that eyes will again stared into chocolate fire put me to a mind test. Was imagining everything. Had no real contact with him or with him just in my mind and did not bring him into my past year livings. I decided that he is free of me and all that was left was a love that is much greater that a body could understand , a memory of someone that is special, will always be, just timing of our clocks was beating different and priorities where not running the same round.

When plane left us into light gravity space, beyond clouds, weight of mind stayed there in Brazil. Breathing was smooth. And even if i didn’t really know what happened it worked.

Mexico, Taxi. Im here. Open the door in a sweet castle apartment on Nuevo Leon and Marina opened the door.

She share something very Mexican with me. Again it’s a chapter if this would really be a book.

She hold me as if she new me and I hold her sincerely back. Still alerted I don’t know her.

It all faded away. Marta was still in the shower when shouting for her began. She embrace me and made me feel home. Covering me with water that was still crying down of to early taken away pleasure of showering.

latter.

Connection was made with him and so did the hug. We are in peace and feelings are loving and friendly. Content with where I am I surrendered and put my self in a seat of this Mexican train with no belt but a huge trust. Im always ok.

Thank u all with Me!!